Natalie's Four Year Birthday Pictures

Natalie wanted a "horse cake."  At first she wanted a pink horse with blue eyes, then she wanted a purple horse but settled on a white horse with purple hair.  You can probably see the theme-her favorite colors are pink, purple and blue.

 

"I LOVE IT!!!" is what I heard when the cake was done.



I love this photo.  Natalie was telling her daddy something and we got the sweetest shot.



"I'm going to be 4 on December nineteen.  That's when my birthday is."  We have been hearing this since Spring.



I had to put in a picture with Mr. Ornery Man in it.  Can't you just see the mischief?  Notice his hands are up on the counter, just waiting for the prime opportunity to swipe some frosting.

 

There they go!  He's getting closer!



And She Pondered all these Things...

Every year when December rolls around we start to get busy thinking about Christmas.  The first thing that comes to my mind is the Baby.  The Baby that was born to save the world-God in human flesh-Jesus.  There was a year that I dreamed of holding a newborn baby in church on Christmas.  In fact, my due-date was the 25th of December.  That year our precious Natalie was born on the 19th.  That event changed our lives forever.  Though I approach the 19th with much excitement seeing our daughter celebrate another milestone, there also comes the fearful memories of days spent in the hospital with a very sick child and the apprehension that comes with wondering what the future holds for our daughter with a special heart.

Mary was given such a special mission and we think of the thrill that she must have had carrying the Son of God.  But at the same time, she accepted a very difficult assignment.  She was engaged, but not married.  Being pregnant outside of marriage could mean death in her time but most certainly public scorn.  Just recently I learned in a Bible study that I've been attending, that when it was said "there was no room for them in the inn" (Luke 2:7) the inn that is referred to was the guest house of relatives.  Probably, Joseph's relatives would have taken in Joseph's family at that time.  During the census there probably weren't a lot of public places to stay so extended relatives would take in their kin.  But could it have been that because of Mary's state she was not allowed to stay in her fiance's relatives home?  Most likely she was turned out and gave birth in a courtyard where the household animals roamed.  It is said that "she wrapped him in cloths and laid him in a manger." (Luke 2:7)  We all think of a cozy little stable with animals looking over the side of their stalls admiring the little baby lying in a manger.  But in reality, it was probably much different than this.  Do you suppose that this is why the shepherds were the first ones to hear of Jesus' birth?  They were the "lowly" ones in this society.  Maybe they wouldn't have questioned the virgin birth.

"When they (the shepherds) had seen him, they spread the word concerning what had been told them about this child, and all who heard it were amazed at what the shepherds said to them." (Luke 2:17-18)  They were amazed?  Were they amazed at the messengers, or the message, or the lowly means that a King could have been born?

"But Mary treasured up all these things and pondered them in her heart." (Luke 2:19)  Mary knew that God had called her into something that would be a lifelong commitment.  She humbly accepted the assignment.  She was witnessing miraculous signs and yet Mary still didn't know how Jesus would save the world.  She didn't know what it would be like training the Son of God.  I wonder if she had apprehension.  I wonder if there was any fear?

So at this time of year, I take heart that even though there are many unknowns out there for my daughter, Natalie, I can take courage from Jesus' young mother who completely put herself into the mercy of God's hands.  She yielded her life to God for her life was not her own.  She took on the task of baring a Son and then watching Him die to save the world.  And because of His resurrection from the dead, I can have hope that no matter the outcome with my daughter's heart, if she accepts Jesus Christ as her Savior, we will be together for eternity in Heaven.

Jesus, Joy of the Highest Heaven

by Keith and Kristyn Getty

Jesus, joy of the highest heaven,

Born as a little baby

Under a wonderous star.

Like us, crying He takes His first breath

Held by His mother, helpless

Close to her beating heart.

Jesus, laid in a lowly manger,

Facing a world of dangers,

Come to turn me a stranger,

Into a child of God.

Jesus, King of the highest heaven,

Learning to take His first steps,

That He might bring us life.

Like us, knowing our smiles and sorrows,

He showed the way to follow,

A way that is true and right.

Jesus, take away every darkness,

Steady my simple footsteps

That I might in Your goodness

Live as a Child of God.

Craig's Two

Last month our son turned two. It's been full speed ahead since then and I haven't gotten a chance to recap the milestones and celebration. It's been awhile since I've written anything about the mitlestones Craig has met.

Craig's first sampling of his cake before it was fully frosted.

Craig has left the Toddler stage and is a full-fledged Little Boy! He was a slow one to talk and I was a little concerned that he wasn't saying any words by 18 months. His pediatrician said with a smile, "He's got three sisters that talk for him and he's a boy so I'm not concerned. Late talkers will start talking and never stop! My son and I were late talkers and look at us now!" (We have a really chatty pediatrician.)
July was the month. Craig started talking...in 2-3 word sentances. He's quite the talker for a boy and is trying to keep up with his sisters. He's not always understandable, but has a LOT to say. Some of my favorite words of his are "dadden?" (again), booball (football), Eat! Eat! Eat! and hungy (hungry). He went from a 6-9 month level in speech in March to a 24 month level in October. Our pediatrician was right!

Craig is still hanging in the 5-10th percentile for weight (24 pounds) and is 34 inches tall (25th %). He may be scrawny, but he's strong. He mantains and iron cross when held by the elbows. He loves to grab ahold of my arm, wrap his arms and legs around my forearm and hang on, all the while wanting me to pick him up over my head. (Good thing he doesn't weigh much!) When he's wanting his mamma, he grabs ahold of my leg and won't let go.

Craig's head is the biggest part of him reaching into the 50th%. He must be exercizing his brain with all of his exploring. Last night, I thought he had followed his sister out to the car after church, but we found him in the church office dumping the toner out of the copy machine! Buttons, levers and knobs turn him on. He's just one curious dude.

Speaking of curious, Curious George is a favorite TV program of his, although any program will usually do. This kid gets "glued" to the TV very easily and is learning about limits.

For Craig's birthday, he got a Bob the Builder birthday cake. I picked up the form for the cake at the second hand store. I didn't get the cake completely frosted while he was down for his nap so he thought he'd help out. He sampled the frosting and the cake even before I got the face on Bob. It was just another one of those times when I had to grab the camera so I could smile later.

The gifts that Craig got were very thematic this year. He got a carpenter's belt with two sets of tools. Incuded in one of the sets was a set of suspenders. He could really use those-he's always losing his pant.

New tools-too bad daddy hid the "real" hammer.



Birthday Cake celebration with Bob the Builder



The Alaska State Fair

The Alaska State Fair is usually in August extending over Labor Day weekend.  This year we had not had a family outing so we thought we'd attempt the fair.  In the past, our older girls haven't even known that it even existed so we didn't feel like we need to introduce them (as it isn't one of Tim or my favorite things to do).  But this year we happened to pass by the fairgrounds in Palmer when they were setting up the rides.  Heidi is a smart girl and there was no way we could keep the fact that the fair was just around the corner from her.

So on Family Day, we packed up and made the 2-1/2 hour drive to the fair.  We joined many other families and the fairgrounds was crawling with children.  The first thing we did was head to the animal barn.  If you've been reading my blog long enough, you'll know that we all love animals.  It was a joy to hear their squeals of delight while we tried to keep track of everyone.  Craig started in the backpack but wanted to get on eye level with the critters so we let him down.  Natalie had a habit of wandering (I think she got that from her mother) and was temporarily lost while she headed to the turkey pens.

After seeing the animals and grabbing some caramel corn, we headed to the kiddie rides.  Craig and Natalie spotted the cars.  The both lit up.  Each had their own interests though.  Natalie enjoyed the cars going up and down while Craig was pushing all the buttons in the car and really wasn't paying any attention to where he was going.  Good thing the cars were all on a track.

Heidi and Jess got their first taste of a roller coaster.  You can see their faces in the second car from the left.  It was a thrill that just whetted their appetite for more.  Each got two rides as this was all our budget would allow and there were promises of rides at a theme park someday...someday.

Jessica snuck in just under the height requirements for the big swing.  Of the two rides, I think they preferred the roller coaster best.

 We couldn't go to the Alaska State Fair without getting a picture with the Giant produce.  Alaska is known for their giant produce.  The long summer days produce prime growing in the Palmer area where they grown huge cabbage, pumpkins and broccoli.

After three hours at the fair, we had had our cotton candy, caramel corn, seen the animals (also those of homo sapien variety) and ridden the rides.  Craig was cranky and finally fell asleep in my arms which meant that I had to carry him all the way to the car.  A lot of use the backpack was.  We hit the grocery store and hit the road for the trip home.  An exhausting day, yes, but which one isn't with our brood.

Buttercup Update

Every time Natalie is asked to pray for a meal we hear something like this..."God, thank you that we can eat our food by ourselves and the chickens eat their food by themselves. Amen."

Even though the chickens no longer reside at our house, their memory is not gone. Just recently, Heidi saw the owner of the chickens. He told her that an owl had gotten Blackberry, but that Buttercup had grown up into a nice big Rooster! A Rooster named Buttercup!!! Maybe he could have fit in with the hens on "Chicken Run" better than his counterpart, Rocky. Mr. John said, "It's a funny thing. That rooster is a loner and just walks around in circles. He doesn't interact with the other chickens." I'm not surprised. He doesn't think of himself as a chicken-he's a kid. He's probably bored too-no flying lessons or gourmet made meals out of green bean ends. He's probably thinking..."Those were the day! I had attention every day. I got to be cheuffered in a bucket. They clothed me like a baby! Oh, for the land of the Hand's."

Night Prowlers

We've had night prowlers lately. Doors opening and shutting. Little feet padding down the hallway. They've entered our room...and we've even found them in the garage. Scary!

Checking Out a Different Pediatric Surgery Center

August 1st we checked out a different pediatric surgery center other than Seattle Children's Hospital.

Craig was born with an epigastric hernia. We were told that he would need surgery sometime to fix it-a minor surgery. We dragged our feet knowing how rough it was with an infant that can't communicate with us. So when Craig's vocabulary exploded in July and we found out that Natalie didn't need to have her Fontan surgery, we decided to schedule Craig's hernia surgery at Providence Hospital.

You can see the little bulge of the epigastric hernia in Craig's belly in the below picture. It hadn't really gotten any worse since his birth, but the surgeon told us that he had see school-age children present with complications from hernia's like this because their parents waited to have the surgery.
The day of the surgery, I woke up with knots in my stomach. Even though I had been talked through the surgery and was told that he may be under general anesthesia all of 15 minutes, my mommy's heart kicked in. I had a fitful nights sleep before surgery morning. I was unsure how my boy who was unfamiliar with hospital environment would accept being separated from mom and dad.

Natalie and Tim were in Anchorage with us. The two older girls stayed home. I took Craig and left early for the hospital. The plan was that after Craig was taken back for surgery, I would go get Natalie and Tim to be there when Craig came out of surgey. After we waited almost the whole two hours in a small intake area before getting an armband for "the patient," (I wasn't impressed) Craig was given his Ativan so he would be mellow when taken back to the surgery area. Because we were at a surgery center that had both adult and pediatric surgeries, protocal was a lot different and parents weren't allowed to be back with their child. Having gone with Natalie back until she had been put under for her heart cath in July, I tried to persuade them to let me go back, but didn't succeed. By the time they came with their little wagon and blanket for Craig, he was sufficiently "mellow" and all he could do was smile as he rolled away.

They weren't kidding when they said it would be a short surgery. Twenty minutes after I left the waiting area, I was buzzed to come back. The gal at the desk said that the recovery nurses wanted me to come back because Craig "was NOT happy!" And he wasn't! I was told that kids this age wake up from anesthesia very upset sometimes. The worst thing for my little man was that he didn't like his IV in his arm. He tugged and pulled, arched his back and pushed against me as I tried to hold him. He did calm down a bit after some apple juice and "happy juice" through is IV. To say the least, it was a quite different experience than I've experienced with our two million dollar daughter after her surgeries.

Craig was a champ. He didn't complain much about pain except for an occasional "owie." Tylenol and ibuprofen kept his discomfort under control. Below you can see the cute little airplane bandage that the assistant surgeon (NP) put on Craig's belly.

Craig's recovery went well and we are thankful that the Lord brought us through one more surgery.

Here Chick-Chick-Chick

Tim is a farmer at heart and loves to have animals around. When a friend proposed the opportunity for us to "chick sit" for the summer, Tim jumped on it. He knew our girls would love it...and they did.
The chicks started out being named by Jess and Heidi. The yellow one was Buttercup and the black one was called Blackberry. They lived in a little cat carrier in our garage with a light on them but quickly outgrew their tiny home.

Heidi learned some skills in craftsmanship from her daddy as they made a bigger cage for their chickens. The girls did a good job feeding and watering them too.

The chicks had a lot of play time. Each of the kids wanted to hold the chicks and as they got older, Heidi and Jess took them everywhere. They tried to teach them how to fly. They slid them down the slide. They carried them down the road in buckets to show to our neighbors. They had them perched four feet in the air, under an umbrella, on a bar attatched to the slide. I wish now that I had gotten a picture of this one. Those chicks were tough.

It was a sad day when we returned the full-grown chickens back to their owners. There were many hugs and some tears when we left, but the chickens were now part of a larger flock and many other animals on the little farm. Though we don't know for sure the fate of Buttercup and Blackberry, I have a feeling that if they ended up on someone's dinner table, they weren't very tender. Those were two tough chickens to endure a summer with the Hand kids.

Breaking the Silence

I've gotten to the place where it's been so long since I've updated the blog that I don't know where to start. So, this will be a more pictoral update of our Summer and Fall.

We had a beautiful Fourth of July. The kids love playing at their Aunt and Uncle's house after the parade. Craig "Cheesing" it up for the camera.
The Three Amigos in their patriotic t-shirts.

Natalie is displaying her self-taught shaving skills. I was told that she "was shaving like Daddy did."

She also checked out the baby powder in the cupboard at the same time. And I found powder in hidden places...days later.

Craig found his new love for a ball and bat. He loves to hit balls with anything he can find-paper towel tubes, sticks, toys and anything else that he can find. It's just too bad that this T-ball stand didn't even last 24 hours for him.

Post-Cath Follow-Up Appointment

Natalie had her post-cath follow-up cardiologist appointment with Dr. Brauner this week. Her oxygen saturations were in the low 80's. I was a little surprised, but contributed a little of that to her being not as hydrated as she probably needed to be. We had a long ride into Anchorage the day before and spent the rest of the day shopping. It's hard to keep hydrated when you're busy. I still feel good about where Natalie is at with her energy level and sats now. I looked over some of her doctor's appointments since she turned one and almost all of them she had saturations in the 70's.

We discussed the pros and cons of waiting as long as we can for the Fontan. Without going into detail, lets just say that it was a sobering reminder of the life-long, delicate balancing-act there will be to keep Natalie's little heart functioning at peak performance.

Since she had her big collateral plugged, Natalie has not wanted to take naps. She seems to do pretty well during the day without one. We went for a three mile hike last week and she walked at least a mile and a half of it. I think that's pretty impressive. Of course she took "rests" in the backpack and stroller from time to time, but that didn't dampen her desire to walk and explore. When we got to the lake at the end of the trail, Natalie enjoyed wading in the COLD water. Her color waned a little, but stayed pink for the most part. I've also noticed that her lips don't turn as purple after she eats too.
Post-cath instructions required no strenuous activity for five days afterward. It was hard to keep her down. She wanted to be thrown in the air by her Uncle. She tackled her brother. She jumped off the couch. She wrestled with her sisters. She ran around like a crazy maniac! Other than the bruise on her neck and the bandaids that she insisted be left on her groin for the full five days, no one would have guessed that she had gone through the cath. It was funny how she counted the days until the bandaids could come off and she could "wrestle."

(Heidi was the brave one and went all the way in the water.)

(Warming up on the canoe.)

( The river that we crossed three times.)

We are so thankful for Natalie's renewed energy and we are pushing the Fontan surgery to the back of our minds for awhile.

Ten Years Ago...

Ten years ago today, I carried my wedding dress into the church during a thunderstorm. Approximately six hours later, my husband and I left with sun on our cheeks and a shower of bubbles being blown in our faces. What a memorable day. Everything happened as it should have and God blessed our marriage.

I want to thank the Lord for my gentle and fun-loving husband. God has done (and is doing) a work in both of us to mold us together and make us one. Thunderstorms or sunshine, God will teach us His ways as we kling to Him as the center and designer of our marriage.

Honey, I hope this is a happy tenth anniversary for you!

A Picture is Worth a Thousand Words

Look at those pink nailbeds! They're beautiful! That's with O2 sats in the upper 80's and hitting 90%

The bottom, purple number is her oxygen saturation.

Red lips and pink cheeks. Waiting four hours post-op to be released.

Natalie being goofy, showing off her oxygen/induction mask that the anesthesiologist made for her. This is the mask that she breathed the "orange gas" through. We are keeping it to practice for the Fontan surgery. (It's a kitty if you can't tell.)

Hugging the giraffe.

After we were discharged from the surgery center, Natalie wanted to go see the fish again. So, we went to the cafeteria to eat some lunch and watch the fish. Then, we toured the hospital to look at all the animals...bringing back old memories.

Post-Cath Report

What a whirlwind of three days we've experienced! I'm sorry that I didn't update on the cath results sooner, but after we were released from the hospital on Thursday, it was time for a nap, then another rushed day on Friday to get home for cake and ice cream for Tim's birthday. I had typed out the pre-op info while we were waiting for Natalie to get out of the cath, but was interrupted by the pager going off announcing that the doctor was ready to talk with us.

Natalie did great going into her heart cath. She was a little apprehensive to start out with, but then when she realized that she was being doted on by the staff, she warmed up. I was able to suit up and go back to the cath lab with her until she "went to sleep." The nurse anesthetist said that she had a surprise for her when she got into the cath lab and there laying on her little pillow was a white little kitty. That was just the thing Natalie needed to get her through and ever since, she's been carrying her little kitty around.

They gave Natalie orange gas to go to sleep and she didn't fight it at all. (She must save all that feistyness for her parents and siblings.) All the invasive procedures, like IV's, are done after she's asleep so she didn't remember any pokes-so nice!

As the wait began, Tim and I went to get some breakfast. We had to be at the hospital at 6:15AM (that was 5:15AM our time) which just seemed like a continuation of the day before. Then we headed up to the Family Resource Center where I got on the computer and Tim did his Sudoku. It's amazing how fast a little pager can make you jump when you're waiting. The pager went off and we packed up to head back down to the surgery center.

(Quick lesson of what a cardiac catheterization looks like on a picture-A small tube is threaded through the blood vessels, vein or artery, until they get to the desired area where they want to look. Then they inject a dye that is radio-opaque, meaning it shows up as a dark area on x-rays. Since blood carries it in the direction that it is traveling, you can see where the vessel is taking the blood and how large the vessel is.)

We met with Dr. Jones who presented us with pictures of what he had done. He said that her pulmonary arteries looked really good. There wasn't any narrowing or stenosis that he could see. The pulmonary arteries are the blood vessels carrying the blue blood to the lungs to pick up oxygen. The Glenn site looked good too. Below is a picture from the cath that Dr. Jones enhanced with drawing in the vessels around the lungs and Glenn site.

(The little bump on the LT PA is scar tissue from the Sano shunt that they placed when she was two weeks old and then removed at her Glenn surgery.)

What Dr. Jones did find was a blood vessel that came off of the innominate vein that was dilated and atrophied. It was allowing a large amount of blood to bypass going directly to the lungs through the superior vena cava.

Imagine you have to fill up a large tub with water. You have a small bucket with a hole in it. You fill the bucket up, but as you run with your bucket of water to the tub, you are losing water the whole way there. It takes you longer to fill up the tub because of the hole in your bucket.

So what Dr. Jones did was take a mesh plug to occlude the extra vessel so all the blood would be directed to the lungs.

What a difference that made! Natalie came out of recovery with an oxygen saturation of 90%!!! I don't think I've ever seen her that high. Her feet were pink and lips were red! I couldn't believe it. I was skeptical thinking that it must be that the anesthesiologist gave her something that increased her sats. I've become so used to seeing Miss Natalie with dusky gray feet and purple lips that her color amazed me. I thought, the real test will be when she starts to run and play. We made it with her walking through the airport with pink lips (even though she still breaths heavily). Going down to Seattle she would want to walk through the airport, but would stop to lie on the benches every twenty yards or so to get caught up. Her oxygen saturations still dip when she is active, but not as low. I keep looking at her feet when she's playing...they don't make it to the egg plant purple color variant anymore. It's so nice. I have to think that she feels better too.

We did discuss the Fontan surgery with Dr. Jones. He said that this cath procedure should give her at least another year. "The longer you can wait, the better," he said. He said that once you do the Fontan, the count-down begins as to how long her heart will last. I still have a lot of questions about this, but am confident at this time that we've done the right thing and will continue to live life to it's fullest...while we wait.

Research

Natalie qualified to be a participant in a research project that is being headed up by Dr. Gordon Cohen (the surgeon that preformed her first open-heart surgery) called Identification of Neovascularization Biomarkers. "This study is being done to try and identify a protein that is produced by your liver. We believe this protein exists in all people and is involved in the regulation of blood vessel growth. Identifying this protein could hold important implications for the treatment of heart disease, cancer and other diseases." (Taken from Seattle Children's consent form.)

Because Natalie was having a heart cath, they were able to take blood samples from different areas in and around the heart to see if this protein exists and how high the levels are. Because of her single ventricle circulation Dr. Cohen believes that her biomarker levels may be lower than in regular circulation. The exciting aspect to this research project for single ventricle patients is that they are hoping to find a way around the pesky collateral blood vessel growth that post-Glenn single ventricle patients deal with. Dr. Cohen and his team think that this protein inhibits blood vessel growth. In people with post-Glenn circulation, there may not be enough of this protein released into the areas around the heart and lungs. This may be why the collateral vessels grow. Identifying this marker could lead to treatment being developed that would keep the collateral vessels from growing in post-Glenn single ventricle patients. If Dr. Cohen's theory is true, a simple supplementation of this protein for children like Natalie would keep them from having frequent cath procedures to coil off collateral vessels.

We're glad that Natalie was able to participate in this research project and look forward to hearing the outcomes in the future. Pediatric cardiology has come a long way in the past thirty to forty years, especially in the area of treatment of single ventricle kids. It's exciting to think of the extra years that research could bring to these kids lives!

Cath Day Pre-op Pictures

(Sorry these pictures are so out of order. I still haven't figured out how to get them in order or move them within my post.)

We finally got a smile out of her once she had her Looney Tunes hospital gown on and as being doted over by the staff.

Waiting in the airport for our flight to Seattle.

Waiting in pre-0p area. Natalie wasn't interested on looking at the camera.

The "I know this is a different place than I'm used to getting my blood pressure taken at..." look.

Daddy and his girl.

We Made It

It was an early morning yesterday-4:30AM-when my husbands alarm went off. The four hours of sleep that I got between 12:30 and then were going to have to be enough for that day. It was a beautiful day to drive the 3-1/2 hours into Anchorage and catch our flight to Seattle. Natalie was all excited about flying on a big plane, but anytime adults started discussing her or "when to get there" she became unusually quiet and tucked her little head to the side. She knew something was going on. As special as she felt being the only one of her siblings to go with her parents on a big plane, she knew that it was unusual and kept asking where Heidi, Jessie and Craig were.

We had a variety of pre-op phone calls that we took on the road. It's a little tricky to get the communication that is needed from the hospital when we are traveling the day before.

Natalie and I sat by an older gentleman on the airplane. He was very kind and asked if she could hold his hand when we took off because he got scared during take-off and landing. I thought he was just being accommodating until after we got in the air and he relayed that he really does have a fear of flying. Natalie was so sweet with him and held his hand and he watched her cartoons with her.

We were greeted by sun and the infamous Mrs. Greene at the airport. What a treat to have a personal chauffeur. We skipped staying at Ronald McDonald House this time since we are only here for an outpatient procedure and will be here for two nights. The Greene's are out hosts with the mosts!

Seattle is so different than any place that I've lived. The neighborhood community aspect is neat. We went for a two block walk to the store...yes, Walgreens is really just around the corner. Natalie had a blast taking everything in. Compared to Alaska, it feels like we're walking through a botanical gardens here in Seattle. We stopped to smell the roses, looked through the quaint little shop windows, slid down a huge slide, watched a man playing violin on the sidewalk and took in the differences in the masses of people. Natalie loved it. She didn't want to go home when it was time, though she would time from time to time and have to be carried. "I tireed. I want you to hold me," she'd say. (We're hoping to fix that while we are here.)

Changes

I was just getting used to the idea of going down to Seattle to have Natalie's heart cath and Fontan surgery. I was looking forward to my girl having pink fingernails and feet. I wanted to see her keep up with her sisters and not get winded. I was feeling good about getting this thing over with.

I didn't want to be separated this time, at least for the first part of recovery. So, we had been planning on taking the whole family to Seattle. Heidi and Jessica are old enough that they understand the gravity of the situation and have real concern for their sister. I think Natalie would be really lonely if her sisters weren't there too. We have been planning to go a few days ahead of time and have a little vacation as a family-all six of us.

Then came Monday.

Early Monday morning, I got a call from Dr. Brauner. He said that when he presented her at the surgical conference, Dr. Jones thought "he could do a cath and help her out enough that she wouldn't need the Fontan for another year." It's been three years since she's had a heart cath and probably a good two years since her last echo in Seattle where they were able to see her Pulmonary Arteries. (Dr. B can't usually find them.) Dr. B said that all the surgeons were concerned about was her weight and of course she hasn't gotten to that magical number yet. So they just wanted to do the heart cath and wait on the surgery. Ugh! I had just gotten over the shock of getting it done so soon...now we have to wait again.

I asked if they could schedule the cath any earlier because my parents were planning on being here earlier in July and could help with the older kids while we went down to Seattle for the cath. Tuesday, I was able to talk with scheduling and reschedule for July 7th, yes, next week!

So we have tickets in hand and are going to get Natalie "tuned up." I'm trying to be patient and flexible. I still remember the quote that I've taken to heart so many years in my life.

"Waiting strengthens our faith and lengthens our perspective." ~ Chuck Swindoll

...and My Heart Stopped

While I was sitting, relaxing in the early afternoon, the phone rang. It was Dr. Brauner's office. The lady on the other end said, "I know that you talked with Seattle Children's scheduling for Natalie's appointments..."

I stopped her. "Uh, I thought we were just going down there for the cath and they didn't say anything about other appointments."

"Well, that's one reason why I'm calling. Dr. Brauner has been talking with the docs down there and they would like to do the Fontan right after the cath-on August 1st."

And my heart stopped. I wasn't really prepared for this. I was thinking Fall or early winter! After all, she's not close to 33 pounds yet. All kinds of thoughts came swirling into my head. "I thought they were going to 'tune her up' to get to her Fontan weight." "Is it really time?" The lady on the phone assured me that the doctors think it's time and that Dr. B. would be presenting her to the Seattle Children's Cardiology Group soon.

I called Tim to see if he thought it would be a good time to get it done. His viewpoint has always been to "just get 'er done" so Natalie can be done and over with it and functioning with more oxygen in her blood. Tim thought he was okay with the date so I called the cardiologist office back to confirm that we were ready for the Fontan. (Ready is always relative.)

Thinking back, God must have known what He was doing when He allowed me to have such feelings of procrastination in starting our plants for the garden. I haven't had the ambition that I usually have to put things in the greenhouse or garden. I guess I'm thankful for those gutt-level feeling that you just can't put your finger on that are given to prepare you for the future.

I just came across the song Blessings by Laura Story on youtube. This is just another song that re-iterates my feelings on how God "blesses" us. Some of my greatest blessings in this life have come from pain. Check it out. Click here.

We Have a Date!

Scheduling finally called for Natalie's heart catheterization. She's scheduled for the second case on July 29th. It does seem like a long time out, but I am just thankful for a date. The huge God thing is that we will hopefully get to see our "heart friends" Joshua and his mom Leah. Joshua was scheduled for a cath in May, but came down with a fever a couple of hours before so his cath had to be rescheduled...on July 29th! God is so good. It's been a long time since Leah and I have gotten to talk and it will be so good to see her again. Joshua and Natalie haven't met each other yet, but I hope they will hit it off.

Thank you to those who have been praying. I've been at peace a little more since unloading last week. We can't do this alone...we need others to help bear our burdens.

Natalie has recovered from her cold and is back to her normal self. She is learning to tease and it's so fun to see her happy and interacting with her siblings. As we follow other children going through their Fontan surgeries, I've been introducing the facts of her next surgery coming up. When we discuss her heart, she gets this little gleam in her eyes because she knows that this part of her life is so uniquely her and no one else can take that away. (We've been struggling with sharing lately.) I have a really cute video of her talking about her heart and who fixed her heart but it's too large to upload to my blogger page. If anyone has any ideas of how to do this, I'd appreciate your help. I know it's been done before. I'm just not that in with technology.

Backing a Little Further

This is such a cute picture, I couldn't leave it out. Craig is about 17 months old here. It's funny how he likes hats. It must be a boy thing. He sees his dad with a hat and needs to have one himself.

Heidi had her first piano recital in April. She did a beautiful job playing two duets with her teacher Mrs. Sommer. You would never have know if she was nervous as she played with perfect composure.

Natalie was serenaded to sleep by the mid-afternoon concert and found herself sleeping while standing. It was adorable.

Jess, isn't the only prankster in this house. This is a favorite action picture. Jess had worked really hard to get the couch cushions all stacked up nice and neat so she could balance on top of them. She was showing me her acrobatic feat when Natalie seized the opportunity to topple the tower!

This is what happens when a little boy tries to climb on a box that wasn't created for his load limit!